German Emperor Bearmanente
No, no, your eyes do not deceive you. I know you all have been anticipating this wondrous day for a long time now, so long that some of you disappointing unbelievers didn't think it would ever come. But here it is, finally, after all this time: my health care company. I of course understand that you all will be clamoring for the right to put your health and wellness solely in the capable paws of me Bear-Bear, but I absolutely refuse to accept more than two hundred fifty dollars from any of you until you have heard a little more about the program and I have decided whether or not you are worthy of it (to reiterate, I will accept the two hundred fifty from anyone who wants to give it right now , no questions asked). The program is called German Emperor Bearmanente, to represent both my vast power and unyielding, unwavering endurance. Also it has to do with the way I am a bear. The focus of the program, I would say, is definitely excellence. I Bear-Bear am essentially the...