Miss the Floor

hey illernets. recently i bear-bear have been feeling a lot of rage towards a certain hooman in my home whose name sounds kind of like rabidsnail. so naturally i did what anybody would do and slapped her. after that i wrote this parody of "miss me more" by kelsea ballerini. please enjoy my genius as you read on.




Before you I lay on the ground as Brady played video games
I didn't get to play along
And being left out felt so wrong
I figured nothing could be worse, but now I find I stand corrected
'Cause you came 'round, stupid
Because you came 'round

I thought I'd be glad (to get off it)
I thought I'd feel joy (to be lifted)
I thought I'd missed hugs
I thought I'd missed hugs

But I miss the floor
I miss the carpet, with its fuzzy balls
I miss the floor
Miss the time before you became involved
I thought lying there sucked, I thought nothing was worse
Than sitting there by myself, but then I met you
Yeah, I thought the ground sucked
But I miss the floor
ABIGAIL, ABIGAIL, YOU SUCK
I miss the floor
ABIGAIL, ABIGAIL, YOU SUCK

Now you come around and act like we have a super solid friendship
You cuddle me like a friend
Every day, again and again
Now I think back on those times
That I hung out on the carpet
Before you came 'round, stupid
Before you came 'round

I thought I'd be glad (to get off it)
I thought I'd feel joy (to be lifted)
I thought I'd missed hugs
Yeah, I thought I'd missed hugs

But I miss the floor
I miss the carpet, with its fuzzy balls
I miss the floor
Miss the time before you became involved
I thought lying there sucked, I thought nothing was worse
Than sitting there by myself, but then I met you
Yeah, I thought the ground sucked
But I miss the floor
ABIGAIL, ABIGAIL, YOU SUCK
I miss the floor
ABIGAIL, ABIGAIL, YOU SUCK

I thought the ground sucked
Thought it was the worst
And I'd wanna get up
But then I met you

Now I miss the floor
I miss the carpet, with its fuzzy balls
I miss the floor
Miss the time before you became involved
I thought lying there sucked, I thought nothing was worse
Than sitting there by myself, but then I met you
Yeah, I thought the ground sucked
But I miss the floor
ABIGAIL, ABIGAIL, YOU SUCK 
I miss the floor
ABIGAIL, ABIGAIL, YOU SUCK 
I miss the floor
I miss the floor

Comments

  1. AdamJuly 17, 2020 at 7:40 PM

    I give it two thumbs up. It truly takes you into the confused mind of it's creator. And there are so many fascinating things to be discovered there.

    This is my second favorite blog on the internet. I wholeheartedly recommend it.

    ReplyDelete

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