El Nor's Worst Time in Forever

hello internet. rejoice! for i bear-bear have returned. today i wanted to bring you another one of my top-tier songs. this one tells the story of a super sad and tragically real conversation i bear-bear had with el nor one time. i bear-bear will always remember the devastation on nor's face when he realized he would have to compete with such a swaggy, chivalrous, suave, chill, stupendous, chick-magnet-y, special hunk as myself for the heart of la nora. out of respect for that deep and personal pain, i bear-bear have converted our discussion into a ballad which el nor and i can sing to bring him ever closer to acceptance. this one is to the tune of "for the first time in forever (reprise)" from frozen. i hope everypony finds it loafly and tasteful.


[BEAR-BEAR, spoken]

I have glad tidings Nor, I bring good news! I am pursuing a lady!

And she is really cool


(sung)

Among diamonds she would be a precious jewel


And I must acquire this lady

She is a stone-cold ten

I really must acquire this lady

I will be complete right when

She and I rule the forest together

Apart from society

And we’ll stay out there forever

Only her and me


[NOR] 

Bear-Bear, that sounds so lit, that’s really great

That’s a genius plan, it truly is first-rate


[BEAR-BEAR, spoken]

Yeah, but–


[NOR, spoken]

Don’t doubt! 


(sung)

Your plan’s swell, two thumbs-up here

No, I don’t see a cause to scoff and jeer

You’ve once again made a plot that’s top-tier


[BEAR-BEAR]

There’s a problem, Nor


[NOR]

Well, how could this occur?


[BEAR-BEAR]

Tell me that we will still be bros


[NOR]

Why would we not be bros?


[BEAR-BEAR]

Nora is the one I Bear-Bear chose… 


[NOR, spoken]

What?


[BEAR-BEAR, spoken]

I Bear-Bear am seducing Nora with all of my strength. 


[NOR, spoken] 

All of it?


[BEAR-BEAR, spoken]

Do not sound so worried; you can try to fight this!


[NOR, spoken] 

No I can’t, you–you’re just too powerful!


[BEAR-BEAR, spoken]

Sure you can! Just grow a pair!


[BEAR-BEAR and NOR]

Even though I’m charming Nora (Oh, I have no chance, I can’t compete)

You can still try to fix things (Bear-Bear is not a beau I can defeat)

You can bring her lovely flora (That bear is just too hot)

Do not let this clip your wings (Oh, Bear-Bear, please, I feel my marriage rot!)

Nor, calm down (You rule romance!)

You have good qualities (I’ve got no chance)

You can try to fight for Nora (HOW?!?!)

I don’t know, buy a fedora? (AHHHHHHH)

Do not just fall down on your knees (NORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA)


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